That's right, I said the first time - not the only, but the first.My husband Barry had worked for the DEF Corporation for a little over five years and...in that time he had gone from an entry level management trainee to the Vice President of Marketing. His boss threw Barry a promotion party at his home and while I'm not a party person that party was more or less a command performance for me. While not necessarily fair, the wives of men at Barry's level were considered part of the package and were. It was amazing – and frightening, because i never thought myself actually capable of such a thing, even though i replayed such instances over and over in my mind when i left Larry ANDY: the feeling of power is said to be a high like an orgasm is a high. And yet your moralistic mind was still making you feel frightened at your own feelings. Is that correct? TONYA: yes ANDY: all of what I just wrote? TONYA: it was an incredible feeling, but it didn’t come close to orgasmic. and yes my mind was. Jeff would have been gratified I didn’t burst into flame and call my father an asshole. My newfound ability not to fly off the handle was a measure both of how far I had come and how far I had needed to come. I was embarrassed at who I used to be. ‘Dad, you have a lot of business friends and associates coming to my wedding. I think you’re not doing them justice by inviting them this way.’ Since I hadn’t had a lot of time to prepare for this, I had discussed the wording with Jeff. He agreed with. ‘I’ll die trying.’ Kate kissed me and said, ‘I’m looking forward to having you do me again, lover. Sleep well.’ And I drifted off. I awoke to the sound of a woman crying. I opened an eye and checked. It was Kate. Now, I’m not a fan of negative emotions, so I determined not to get involved. I lay quietly, listening to hear if I’d had a part in whatever was making her so upset. If so, I wanted to be sure and not do it again. Kate and Kelli were lying face to face. Kelli was stroking Kate’s hair.
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